New wise mother, good wife

Past – Wise mother, sweet wife, stay-at-home mom. Passive and obedient women were thought to be perfect wives.

Present – A wife who earns a lot of money, makes smart money investments, and looks gorgeous. She must be good at housekeeping, raising and educating children.

So the Korean series “Modern Housewives” also known as “New wise mother, good wife” begins running on national TV with a definition of an ideal wife and mother from the eyes of a jaded sole breadwinner and newsmaker.

The husband to a full-time housewife (part-time supermarket cashier) is now a disgruntled white collar, struggling to cope with the demands of a sandwiched middle class. The wife, for her lack of sophistication and economic independence, is a liability rather than an asset, her role as a homemaker is taken for granted, her daily struggles to cope with the required tasks are considered as signs of incompetency and her contributions never appreciated.

A situation that is typically facing most single income Asian families. What was once a slogan taken by the first wave Japanese feminists to empower the women with political will, ‘wise mother, good wife’ or ‘good mother, wise wife’ had been reinterpreted to serve the needs of chauvnistic societies. The good woman is one who will sacrifice herself for her family welfare, regardless of whether she is a full-time homemaker or co-breadwinner.

And so, modernity in Asia has ironically enslaved rather than free the modern women. Marriage remains a chauvnistic shackle for the modern woman, it would seem. But the modern housewives in ‘New wise mother, good wife’ would beg to differ. Divorce is not the only way out, nor is economic independence the only means to gain respect. The key is to free oneself from the ideology of a ‘wise mother, good wife’. The modern woman has to embrace her own individuality first, before her husband or her family.

She is not afraid to give and forgive, but her emotional generosity should not compromise her standing in the family or society.

‘New wise mother, good wife’ offers a fresh take on the dilemma facing the modern woman, man and family. Not only does it seek to break away from traditions that confines individuality, it also re-affirms the spirit of humanity.

Music speaks louder than words

Thursday nite, my sensory organs went overdrive getting tingled by Kitaro’s out of this world music. For the first time in my life, I felt lifted by the true prowess of music – a world where words aren’t necessary and a mutual understanding could be reached by just performing or listening with your heart. And where lights and images are secondary to sounds while our sense of hearing takes control of our emotions. We feel rather than think through the abstract rather than the defined. For Kitaro is not a man who sticks to labels. This is a self-taught musician lauded for marrying the east with the west in leading a new wave of music that has come to be known as New Age. But yet, while others will thrive on the fame of being the leader of the pack, the free spirit in Kitaro refuses to conform to a label. Just as he refused to bend to orders from the Singapore’s authorities to forgo his long tresses for entry into the country 20 years ago, Kitaro is rejecting the label of New Age.

“The New Age category still exists in the Grammy Awards, but my philosophy is, I don’t care about trends, I have my own style.”

In a world where words could no longer buy understanding let alone say trust, Kitaro is saying let’s awaken the conscience, which doesn’t need a mould or definition, but is simply hidden in a forgotten corner of the human soul. Let us start listening to our hearts and not our minds.

I’m a Kitaro convert now.

More on Kitaro

Kitaro’s music journey http://www.domo.com/artist/kitaro-bio.html

Muji (no label) man 🙂

Possibly his most loved piece, Matsuri